Conspiracies

“I don’t think I really have any major conspiracy theories that I buy into,” I say. A few of my friends and I are at dinner together, watching the Michigan basketball game (sad). One of them is having a conspiracy party at her place next week. We all have to show up with a presentation of our favorite theory and I am stumped.

“Larkin, that’s such a lie. You’re the biggest Gaylor I know,” Ahana counters.

Background here: A “Gaylor” is someone who believes that Taylor Swift plays for both teams. Um, hello? Karlie Kloss? Diana Agron? There is literally a video of her and Karlie kissing. The evidence speaks for itself. Sure, she hasn’t come out and said it, but if you would like I can point you in the direction of some extremely incriminating lyricism.

“Well. That’s not a conspiracy theory. That’s just fact,” I say.

“Dude, that’s what people say about the moon landing,” she laughs.

“Oh. Oh jeez.” My brow furrows as I think through all of the different hot topics that I am absolutely positive are true. I might not care too much about who actually built the pyramids… but there are absolutely tunnels under Disney World. “Okay, actually, I think I have a lot of conspiracy theories.”

As it turns out, figuring out what to give a presentation on is going to be difficult for me. Not because I don’t have any conspiracy theories that I buy into… but instead because I might have too many.

Do you have any favorites?? Let me know!